What do you give someone who has everything?

It's been quite a while since I was asked if I would help make someone jealous, let a loan be a gift. I rather like the idea of being hired as a gift. It lets me know that while I may not turn heads the way I use to, I can help someone else turn a head or two. A few weeks ago I got a call from my friend Joyce asking me what my plans were for this past weekend? With Joyce you learn over the years not to ask too many questions because that just slows the flow of information streaming through her brain. If computers were the extension of the human mind, then Joyce is the starting point the computer's use for speed. After telling her I had nothing that I couldn't change, I asked "why, what's up"? She said "I'll call you back". Within what seemed seconds, she was back on the phone asking if I wanted to fly back to New York with her after we finished a re shoot on a past job. Being the Gemini that I am, I had to ask at least the basics. Seemed she and her husband Frank were going to a 50th wedding anniversary. Frank had the clever idea that I should be the gift. What does one give to a couple married 50 years? What else could you possibly need? In the case of my parents, my Mom wanted an electric tea pot. Simple. Easy. Of course not what she ended up with, but that's a different story. So I became the gift. I packed up my lotions, potions, travel size of course) lipstick, an eye lash curler and one or two other secrets, booked a flight then waited. "How did you get all this through the airport security" I was asked as I was unpacking my wears. "Easy. I went to a female scanner. If she couldn't tell the difference between a lip brush and a hair brush, then I would teach her. Thankfully I heard, have a nice flight as I grabbed my bag and shoes." As Joyce and I arrived at the hotel where I the couple were staying, it struck me that in all the years she and I have been together, through all the crazy antics, that only Lucy and Ethel could appreciate we were on time. Even the prior romp through Bloomingdale's followed by a $15.00 hot dog that yes, was delicious, we were still on time. You have to understand, in the five years I lived in New York I can't tell you once when I was on time. Joyce commented years later that after moving to Florida I became a stickler for punctuality. While the small talk was taking place, I went about rearranging the room to better work. It's a habit that some of my friends and I have about redoing hotel rooms to better suit our needs. Just ask my friends Tony and John about the Sheraton in Phenix. Of course the Walnut Street Inn in Philadelphia was more of an abortion which nothing short of demolition could help. And I have the pictures to prove it. As I started to work my magic both with my creams and lashes, I could feel the pride coming from this woman's husband as he watched from a far seeing the young girl he married some 50 years ago. I knew I was the perfect gift at that moment. You see I have a knack for bringing out the very best of you. So on this night, in front of friends, family and her life long partner, she was a glow. Just as she was the day they married all those years ago. R-

Got the time?

Have you noticed that people can't tell time any more? Or at least give a good estimate of how long they will be or something will take? I finally was able to switch my old web site over to the new one. "It should take about 30 minutes for the change to happen" the girl said. Yea and about 30 seconds for the payment to hit my AMEX card. Thirty. Forty. One hour. Still waiting. Thank goodness I'm not dependent on the site for my livelihood or anything. But I'm use to waiting. See post about Jessie. Does accurate time calulating come under etiquette I wonder? To all who are curious as to what my new site looks like, check it out. Cause I know you'll click right to it after you read this. After all, it's now been two hours since she said, "thirty minutes". Oh wait, you don't think she meant thirty hours do you? R-

Donations come in all shapes and sizes

From time to time we all do our part for charity. I have fund raised, chaired, bought tickets to, and collected donations for the best of them. And like most, I get a bit burnt out. So now I am smarter about giving my time to a worthy cause. A trip to visit a client at her office would turn into an unexpected donation for the University of Miami. The University has a program called The Miami Project to Cure Paralysis. Which my client is part of. It helps men with spinal cord injuries father children. They have had so many successful births over the years. My client Nancy is a research scientist and has been with the project for more years then I can remember. From time to time testing is done between men who have no problems getting it um... Well you get the idea, and men who even viagra can't help. When they moved into their new state of the art facility Nancy had invited me to see the new research center located at Jackson Memorial followed by lunch. As I took the tour, she introduced me to her colleagues showed me the new gym and then in a spur of the moment asked if I would like to be part of the study? It seems they were always short on men and had already exhausted their friends around campus. Without thinking much about it I agreed. I was then handed a cup and shown to an examining room. Your part in the study begins by you giving a sample. So there I sat with cup in hand thinking I didn't have to pee. I just went. So I sat. About 30 minutes later Nancy knocked on the door and asked if I needed more time? As I explained to her I didn't need to go, I heard her start to laugh and then say "not that kind of sample" It took a few seconds to register what she was asking me for. And then it hit me! "Excuse me? Um you want WHAT? In THIS cup"? She then came into the room and asked if I still wanted to participate? Then said I could watch some porn however their collection left much to be desired. "unfortunately for you it's all straight. Not a gay video to be had. It's next to impossible to get the University to pay for it even if it is for research" "Sure, why not. At this point in for a penny..." Watching it was like looking at an old Three Stooges episode. Lets just say that the porn they offered was anything but stimulating. To anyone! Straight or gay. So that night I called a client who runs a porn shop! The University now has a brand new DVD player along with an updated collection of DVD's and magazines. The manager of the shop received a wonderful thank you letter from Nancy on behalf of the department. Which my client proudly framed and hung above the register. All in a day's work I'd say.

Did you hear? They brought the Magic door back!

I think it's wonderful when someone offers a suggestion or another point of view to a problem. Lets face it, we all are willing to add our two cents,wanted or not. What I find flustering is when the offering isn't seen by you as"oh my gosh, why didn't I think of that?" Or what seems so simple to the person suggesting the solution, they become defensive when you try to explain that A, you've tried that. Or B, it's not practical and why. Lately things have been a bit slow for work. For many reasons. If I say anything I get "why don't you go to work in a really nice salon?" Then what? Unless I'm mistaken, that magic door hasn't been around in years. Let me explain. That's the door that the salon owner of this new fancy salon I've just gotten a job in, opens. Behind it are lots and lots of new clients who were just waiting for me to start working there. Now they can sit in my chair one by one. An endless supply. And at the end of the week, there's a pot of gold for me to take home. Now I can get back on track and pay those bills and have some spending money too. Now why didn't I think of that? R-

These twins of mine.

If you ever spent any time with me you would run like hell or become totally hooked. You see there are two of me. In fact there are at least two. I am betting another one and a half are lurking somewhere off the cost. Your thinking "what is he talking about, and a half"? See Gemini's are multi talented, with personalities to match each day of the week. I know a little about a lot. Able to leap tall buildings, and then tell the architect how he or she could have designed it better. And be totally right. I fight for principle. I also have cut my nose off to spit my face. Hey, it grows back. OK, maybe this time a bit larger but it's still mine. I remember having a conversation with my friend Bruno's lover Bob during a dinner party. At one point he said "I just love talking to the both of you". "Most people never get that about me." "Oh there are definitely two of you and you both never cease to amaze me! One will ask a question and the other will answer it". Now Bob had little patience for most of Bruno's friends. And Bruno knew if anyone could keep Bob entertained it was me. But I have to say while I didn't expect Bob to get it, I never let on that I was surprised and flattered. Now if I could figure out who to get each to listen to the other...R-

Guilt, I learned from the best

I can still hear the disappointment in my Mom's voice as I told her I just got my new computer. Without a computer of my own, my parents knew I would be by to visit at least two, maybe three times a week. Even if it was only to check email and then run. Not that I won't go to see them, just it will be a bit less often. Besides, one doesn't grow up with an Italian Mother and Jewish Father without being infused with guilt. But worry not, I have O C S (only child syndrome) that and some well placed guilt of my own, and it balances out! Example: My parents were living in Naples while I was in New York. My Mom called to tell me if I didn't come home soon, she was going to cut all her hair off. "Go ahead I said, no one there knows I'm your son. Your the one who has to live with it." As she took that in she then said,"good point. Lets start again shall we? Hi. You know, there running some good specials to Florida. How about we send you a plane ticket? Oh, maybe you can bring your Scissors"? "I think that's great idea, but I'll take care of the ticket". "Your a good son". "What can I say, I got the best of both of you". R-

Food for thought

We are such creature's of habit. I think I'm getting good at using the computer when I can complete my tasks without trying to figure out what something means. Spent hours on something that should have taken minutes, or left the computer in one piece when I am finished. One thing I know is that there are a few people (like me) who have not a clue about wording and doing things on the computer. For example. Port. As far as I know you drink it, you park your boat, yacht, or ship in it. I wanted to see how many people were reading my blog. (self importance thing) So I do what I always do. Look at each setting and hope I will find the button that says Rick, click here. Like when you go into the refrigerator for the tenth time hoping to have missed something. Or like now in typing this. I seem to have the friggin ghost that messes with the spacing key. You know, when you backspace and then the letters type over the next word. But I'm clever. I will out smart it. The trouble is you try so many things you forget how you got there in the first place. So for now I'm tucking my tail between my legs. Refusing to give up. I'm taking a lunch break. Yea, that's it. Lunch. Knowing that there are lots of you viewing my blog! R-

I'll get back to you, or maybe not?

So what is it about getting back to someone when they call? Do you think that I'll just get tired and go away? I find that a lot lately. Maybe because I'm in a service business and trying to give good customer service that I expect it too? I hear this all the time about how no one returns phone calls, or better yet, not show up. That I think is my favorite. I have a friend Jesse. He is great for telling me I'm on my way. After about two hours I call him. It could take three days before I can even reach him. His answer? Oh, something came up. Meanwhile he lives two blocks away. And they all sound so sincere don't they? Is there a school that these people go to? It has to be some exclusive thing. But they sure do turn out some top graduates don't they? Double talk and the run around must be popular classes to take? When you find out let me know, or not. R-

A new beginning, now what to do with it?

It's been interesting these last few weeks. In some ways I feel like I did when I first moved to New York in 82. Ok, so I'm not young and cute anymore. Though I was never cute. Hot could be a word I'd use! And of course I'm not anywhere close to 27. But starting over. Again. At least with buying clothes. Yet if you look in the closet I do have things to wear. One client gave me six pair of shoes! There all shades of brown and the same style but hey. Thankfully it's hot here. Come this winter I may have to get creative but that months away. The generosity of my clients has been overwhelming. If you saw the new place you'd think I was living there for years. I almost have more things now then BF! What a way to start my 50th year. Which is coming in about three weeks. Along with a red hat I was told?? At least when I first moved to New York I was wet behind one ear. Now I'm moisturizing and drier then ever! I'm also more jaded then I was. Too bad about that. But I also have much more wisdom. That comes with age. Which I'm grateful for. The rest I'm taking one day at a time. Youth part two here I come. You'd better be ready. R-

Endings 4 new beginnings

Funny how the unexpected can take and shake up your world. April 19th I had a fire. It was from the hot water heater. Which was contained in a closet and the fire was put out by the water! However the closet it was in was my clothes closet. Ironic since I am in the fashion business. The smoke damage was through out the house. When the cleaning girl arrived, she found the tail end of the fire. Thankfully no one was hurt. I am now in a house downtown Ft Lauderdale. I think I have more things now through the generosity of friends and clients! As my friend Virginia Alexander would say: "endings for new beginnings". I will be 50 this coming June. I kept saying I was going to start a new life. I guess the universe wanted to help? I have now gone back to a salon where I worked for ten years. They are in a new location with new owners and some new faces. I am shooting with some great new photographers and have seen more then a few new clients. As far as clothing I am left with two pair of shoes, one in black the other in brown, a handful of tee shirts and jeans, some pull over's better suited for a cooler climate, a belt or two and some socks and underwear, and a tuxedo jacket which was at my parents. I am the luckiest person in the world. 50 will be great beyond belief. Of course it would help if I could get my porsche fixed. But I'll save that for another posting! Besides, the rental car came in handy for moving!!! R-

Duelling Diva's

It's the simple things in life that sometimes are the most rewarding. And the most flustrating. I can't tell you how many times I have tried to change images I get from working on projects. JEPG's and pixel sizes should be simple right? Most of the modeling sites all ask you to submit your images as a JEPG. And the size ranges from 100 pixels up to and depending on your membership, 500 pixels. Today I got to see the pictures from a shoot I did for two of my clients. Both are international opera stars. Wendy Reynolds and Birgit Fioravante. They asked me to help them with publicity shots for their new tour, Duelling Diva's. What a blast. Words can not even describe the craziness and the fun. The final image I chose for their poster screams the title of the tour! I wanted to use this image on some of the modeling sites since it's so different from what you'd expect to see. Imagine how happy I was to stumble across a program to resize and change the format of the image. Yea, right. The best I could get the size to was 18.9 pixels. That was easy. Trying to increase the pixels drove me up the wall. At one point I realized I had gotten the pixels to 140. But then I couldn't change the image from mix to JEPG. For now the image stands at 18.9 pixels. And so I'll wait as I always do. Wait until some kind soul I've asked will resize the image for me! Hope you all enjoy the shot as much as we do! R-

Just another day.

This past Saturday my friend Virginia Alexander and I had gotten a chance to work together. We have not done so for quite some time which is a shame since it actually is more like play for us when we are together. I received a call a few weeks ago from a bride asking me about makeup for her wedding. When I asked her who was doing the hair, she said the salon at the Biltmore. That's where she and the wedding party were staying. After meeting with the hotel a couple of times the bride called me and asked if I was able to now do the hair and makeup for her and her party? Not a problem I said but I'll need to have someone come with me. The bridle party consisted of seven. Including the bride's Mother. The Biltmore is a wonderful old five star hotel in Coral Gables Florida. I have been there many times for work and play. Now they say you should make the most of your wedding day. Memories to last a life time. And that is just what this bride will have. Most know that the day of a wedding is almost always a bit crazy. Imagine adding to that craziness by having the fire alarm go off. There we were, nine of us in the suite now having to grab what we could and file out of the hotel. No one panicked. No one had thoughts of oh my gosh, the wedding. In fact we all acted like it was just part of the day! As I looked back into the bedroom, I noticed the woman who had been steaming the dresses. She was quietly coming towards me pushing the steamer. Then it hit me. I went into the bedroom to see that she had been steaming the clothes under the smoke detector! We had set off the alarm. I yelled out it's us. It's us. I grabbed a chair and climbed up to knock the smoke alarm from the wall. Laughing we started back into the room. Now the room over looks the front of the hotel. Yep, you guessed it. Hanging over the balcony yelling down to let everyone know what had happened. Which was a bit hard since the room is on the 14th floor. At the same time rushing the room was management. Virginia and I just sat back trying to figure out how we were going to get this day back on track? As we said our good-byes to everyone as they finally left for pictures, Virginia and I sat on the balcony as she lit a cigarette. You know she said, No one is going to believe us! "Yes they will. Lets face it, this is a typical day for us". We gathered our gear and as we walked past the concierge I asked, could someone straighten up the bridal suite? He smiled and said, "no problem. We got it covered" The look on his face said just another day at the Biltmore.

They say what doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

Wasn't it amazing how automation was going to make our lives easier? Sadly I remember when the banks told us how much money we were going to save by using ATM machines. Or phoning into a computer instead of a person to pay our bills, move our funds. If we don't have to send you your canceled checks, why, it's cheaper! And now pay pal is the hot new thing. What does that cost? And why do I have to pay to have a pal? What might be even sadder is that when you get a customer service rep you find out that they just started. They are telling you what you want to hear instead of the truth, of course they don't know the correct answer because they just started, but everyone before them was incorrect and they have the right answer. Which you don't want to hear. But only after they put you on hold hoping you'll give up and go away while thinking silly Americans. My favorite just might be, FAQ's. Trust me when I say my question is never answered on the FAQ page. I'm the one with the profound thoughtful questions. You know like when Pam only dreamed that Bobby died on Dallas. How come then on Knots Landing they all mourned he loss? Now to be fair these things have also worked in reverse. Which makes our lives easier. Funny how We tend to take them for granted. As a very wise client of mine once said, "your allowed an off day. Just not the day I come in". So in a few hours I get to call Fifth Third Auto, again. I get to hear how they were justified in taking two payments instead of one. Now out of the blue I owe late fees. The same amount as my payment. Which I make to a person at an extra $12.75 a month so I will not have these problems. I guess automation is cheaper then a person after all. I'll check the FAQ's to see where my extra money goes a month and get back to you.

No rabbit was harmed in writing this

Some days it's like taking candy from a baby. Those are the days you have so much stuff you want to write about you can almost hear the topics saying pick me, pick me. Of course there's that other side when you wished you knew where that scrape paper was you jotted an idea on while driving in traffic. Then there are the posts I feel I should re visit with updates. Well, as luck would have it, this post is just that. An update. On luck. As I checked my emails I counted four from friends that wanted to bless me, protect me, wish me luck or just a cry out please is there anyone left out there that will say they still except mail from me without having to do something with it? Enough already. If I had all the luck that will be bestodedded on me, I'd be on a yacht someplace sailing around the Greek Islands! So here's the deal. Your lucky if you say you are. Pass it along as your final email on that subject. Now send the rest of the good lucks, blessings, and wishes to all the people that send you spam asking for money. Just think how blessed they'll feel knowing now they can stop mooching off others because you cared enough to bring a positive change into their lives? R-

You expect me to tell him that?

Automation. We love it. But it comes with a price. In my case $503.47. That's the amount of money missing from my checking account. I decided reluctantly to have my car payment taken from my checking account for the last three months of 05. I was sick and tired of hearing about how I should set up an account with bill pay. What, you all on commission or something? After explaining over and over again why I did not want to, I said OK, let me see. So come Jan 06 knowing I had to make the car payment I called into the bank. Which costs me $12.75 extra I might add to assure my payment is posted on time. (That's another story) imagine my surprise to find the bank took two payments instead of one. "Oh, we are so sorry" I was told. "Don't know how that happened? Of course we will put the money back right a way". (Do you hear laughing)? That was Jan 25,06. Guess what? Still waiting. As I sat in a branch office of this bank three weeks later talking with the one person with a face to go along with his name, it was nice to see steam coming from his ears instead of mine. You see he has been working with me to get the money put back into my account. The look on his face was as they say priceless when he said into the phone, "you expect me to tell the customer that, OK, fine". With that he hung up the phone, turned to me and repeated "your money is in a black hole". After a few seconds of silence the entire bank including myself busted out laughing. Nothing that I'm told from this bank surprises me. They don't care. They pretty much said so. Oh but they want to know when I will be sending in the Feb payment. Maybe because I'm in a customer service business that I expect it. Maybe because even when I took my first job at McDonald's at a $1.60 a hour I gave it my all. Or even when my Dad said to me "if you chose to be a ditch digger be the best one you can". Customer service. Repeat after me. Thinking the bank should go into the black hole after my $503.47!!! Thank you Fifth Third Bank. You never cease to amaze me. R-

The Box

My parents called today to tell me they bought a new TV. But they don't know how to program it. Didn't the salesman show you how I asked? No, they said read the book, it's in the box. Excuse me? You just spend X dollars and you have to read the booklet? How could you not have ask? Well we didn't said my Mom. And Jerry, the guy who took you in his truck to get the set, when he carried it into the house, did you ask him? Oh he said the directions are in the box. We tried, but we can't get it to work. We'll just wait for you. As I let out a cy I started to wonder when we as a society made the box a scapegoat? When did the box start to take the heat or even hold any real answers at all? Foolish me. Why not collect A pay check for doing part of my job, and let the box answer the questions? Guessing it's the Same box that holds the answers to did you check the FAQ before you ask a real person? Yet to a child A box can be a toy. For my friend's dog, A safe place for her and her five new puppies. Take my client Jackie. A few years ago she had become a foster parent to a remarkable girl wise beyond her 6 years. When She asked Amelia what she wanted for dinner that first night she said mac and cheese. Jackie thought great! How easy is this. Now just so you know, my Mom makes the best macaroni and cheese. Jackie's is a real close second. If you had a choice of a last meal, this would be it. Grab your chest, tell your maker get ready here I come. Clogged arteries, cholesterol central. This by far is the big one. About two hours later Jackie removed her 3 cheese, butter, milk, spices, with bread crumb and more cheese topping from the oven. Sitting down Jackie waited as Amelia started to eat. Two bites later she put down her fork, turned up her nose and started shaking her head no. Jackie asked, don't you like it? It's not the box Jackie Bell. Kids like the box. Who knew the time and money one could save when feeding a 6 year old? I was delighted to get the call to come for dinner. I brought mac and cheese in a box for Amelia and a container for left over's. Now if I could only get Amelia to program my parents TV. I'd send her a case of mac and cheese! R-

Mirror mirror on the wall

They say what you dislike in others is merely a reflection of what you dislike about yourself. If that is true then I'll need to move to a very quiet place and hope they have lot's of delivery services. I was asked to write a column for a new web site going up for the modeling industry. I was extremely flattered and also at a loss as to what to say. Now just so you all know, I am never at a loss for words! While writing for a large group of readers about hair is going to be a wonderful experience, what do you say to them on the first read? "Hi, my name is Rick and I'm going to write about hair?" So I did what I always do, procrastinate. OK, figured the words and style would come to me when I needed them. And they did. Pulling a rabbit out of a hat as I always seem to do, I wrote about something that I was doing that day and turned it into how it could help others. Now, the owner of the site said he loved my style of writing from what he had read on this blog and I should pen the column that same way. With that I let the readers know how I was lead to make assumptions along with putting my foot into my mouth. Figured humor was the way to go. Happy with the finished story I was a bit surprised to see the owner of the site rewrite the article. As I read the new story I thought fiction. Total fiction. I can now understand how writer's in Hollywood must feel. So I took a good look and wondered if I was this person he had written about? After sending him an email explaining my thoughts he reread my original article and explained he was quick to the draw. Kinda like I was with regard to what inspired my article in the first place. What I see in the web site owner is that he is very hard working. Very much a perfectionist and wants only the best of the best. Which brings a smile to my face when I think about it. Now I have never met him but I think we are going to get along just fine! R-

Is that a snow suit? She was wearing a bikini when we started

I have to laugh. I go to the Walgreen's and use their picture making machine. I have it down to a fast few seconds. I have started using mini books for the agencies and photographer's. It costs more then a comp card which most use to show their work but it looks more impressive. And I can change the images whenever I want. I would go after midnight and before sun up. Had the store to myself. I could be in and out within seconds. They knew me by name! Then the store shut off the machines at 11 PM. Now I have to wait behind every amateur photographer with a CD and a finger. Today,after much procrastinating I waited just under 15 min ( timed it) so a guy could pick images of his kid in a snow suit. Loaded in my CD then waited, and waited then BAM. Frozen. Twice. OK, at least I saved the second CD from the same shoot until the end. Thankfully I managed to choose and edit images. Until the computer spit out the CD and shut down! At least I got the CD back. A thank you for coming and spending $56.00 would have been nice. That shoot left me cold anyway. Not in the same way as that kid in the snow suit but non the less. Now I find out I can make prints 24/7 again or stay home and email my order! I'm just afraid I'd get the prints from that kid in the snow suit! Which when I think about it, would be funny. R-

Here's to ghosts, trains and 06

They say there's a reason for everything. Like getting stuck at the train when your already late. Or sitting in a traffic jam for what seems like miles and endless minutes wasted only to find your now driving faster then the speed limit. Trying to go to familiar web pages that now you must sign into to gain access. Again. I try and look past these things. The ones that drive me crazy. Like finally getting the contractor to show up. In my case my web guy to finish work on my web site. We are so happy when things get back on track we forget if there is some lesson we needed to learn? I have found that some things are easiest explained by the ghost in my house. No, it isn't "the not me ghost". I have no kids. Just some energy that was here long before I moved in. Looking for some answers just like me! So to my readers and my ghost/s Happy 06 and expect the unexpected. Again. R-